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I actually got to go out this weekend � WITHOUT MY KIDS. I know, right? Crazy. We had originally planned to bring them with, but the closer it got, the more I didn�t want to. It was a birthday party for a family friend�s 50th birthday and her son�s 16th birthday, and I could see it being a seriously drunken social engagement � totally unsuitable for my babies. So Nick called his girlfriend (you know, that one friend that is totally his bitch, every boy has one, this one�s name is Joe) and told him to get up because he�s babysitting, and we went out. BY OURSELVES. When we got there, I was incredibly glad we had left the kids with Joe. We got rock star parking in the driveway because someone was just leaving, but if we hadn�t, we would have been blocks away. There were almost a hundred people there! And so much liquor! I drank many beers and even did a shot of tequila (which was gross). Danielle has been dying for me to meet her brother�s girlfriend, with whom she has been telling me I would totally hit it off. Well, two hours after we met, we were best buds. This girl rocks:
That�s Farrah. On the right, I�m on the left. Doesn�t my hair still look reddish? Nick says it�s way too blonde. I refused to take my coat off all night because when I asked Nick if I looked okay, his eyes got really big and he said, �Well, yeah. Your boobs are humungous!� Thank you, new stupid birth control pills. Now I�m a freak. But anyway, Nick, Farrah, Jaime (Danielle�s brother), Rob (Nick�s dad), and I ended up leaving the party in search of some, ahem, party favors. I wish we hadn�t, though, because when we got back Danielle was nearly in tears because people are stupid. Apparently someone had given all the guests who were there for the sixteenth birthday some Jack Daniels and Jager. Not cool, and they were puking. And Danielle was cleaning it up. Lord. I felt terrible for leaving her, and by then it was almost one o�clock in the morning, and I had to leave again to go home. I settled for smacking Jaime (who was the corrupter of youth and buyer of alcohol for underage guests) and promising Danielle that the next time I left a party, she would be with me. Yesterday Nick took Lukas with him to work so that I could have a little break from the incessant fighting, and I was pleasantly surprised when Nickolas suggested we take a nap. I am always game for a nap, especially when the night before only provided three hours of sleep. So we curled up in my big warm bed and slept for a good three hours. Pure bliss. It�s like sleeping with a huge hot water bottle. When we woke up, he wanted to play hide and seek. His strategy is this: while I�m counting, he runs to the nearest wall and faces in. As soon as I yell, �Ready or not, here I come,� he turns around and runs to me, yelling, �Boo!� He�s a little unclear on the concept, but it�s adorable. Well, yesterday, he tripped over his own feet and went flying, right into the corner of a wall. It made a horrible noise, and I swear my heart stopped beating. He looked a little unfocused for a minute, but then, thank God, he started to cry. The rest of the afternoon was spent watching TV with a bag of frozen peas on his little head. I was so scared he�d crushed his head and I�d have to bring him to the emergency room, where they would take one look and declare me an unfit mother and take both my kids. And forcibly tie my tubes right there. Terrified. But he�s okay, no signs of a concussion or anything. Phew. I could really use a little less of that in my life, seriously. Oh, and apparently we�re waiting for the marker to just sink into the drywall or something, because we still haven�t painted. I�m sure it�ll be a while. DMIL just told someone that when Nick was little and kept playing in ashtrays (why were there ashtrays where he could reach them?), she gave up trying to keep him out of them and just let him suck on cigarette butts. Then she said that she decided then that if she ever had any more kids and they were naughty, she�d slap their hand and make them suck on a cigarette butt. Well that�s just great. She�s never watching my children again. I could not make this shit up. Kids are: Don't know what it is. Last person who pissed me off: DMIL. Gross. Heard in my house: "I don't want peas on my head. Peas make my head hurt." Miss Anything? pics - 2007-06-05
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