Current ~ Archives ~ Profile ~ 101 Things ~ Notes ~ E-Mail ~ Rings ~ Design



at 2005-07-06 around 10:20 p.m.

You know what's cool? Bats. Bats are fucking rad. I've been watching them for about an hour now.

So I haven't done a drunken entry for a while, and I figure I'm due right about now.

DMIL's husband came over earlier. Nick was in the shower. I tried to ignore him as best I could until he got out of there, but it was awkward. Nick finally got out, and I poured myself a glass of wine, the first of many, and went outside with my book to wait it out. When he finally left, Nick filled me in. He started out all nice and shit, but towards the end was asking Nick how I could be so awful to DMIL after all she's done for us. All she's done? Meaning constantly undermining everything I say, or meaning beating us down until we believe that we'll never make it on our own? Fuck that bitch. Then he asked Nick how I could say that I hated her and I always have, which, well, I never did say so I don't know how I could say it. I guess she's been saying all kinds of shit that I never said and turning everyone against me. I don't really care, but then again I do. I don't even know anymore. It's got me all kinds of fucked up.

So I called Katie, because that's what I do when I can't handle my life. I told her about how we're moving and how I'm really confused about it. I told her that I haven't eaten in days but I have run about twenty-five miles. She knows what that means. We just sat there and tried not to cry. I miss her so much. It's not fair that she doesn't live ten minutes away anymore. It's more like eleven hours now. That's too far. But our men are adamant about staying where we are, so we go along. This sucks.

Friday night is Cowboy Mouth. Nick wants to go down and look at that house. I said he should go and take the kids so I could go to the concert, and to O.A.R. the next night. He said, "Okay, fine, if the concert is more important to you." No, but I can see the house the whole time we live there. Cowboy Mouth is not going to come over and perform for us. I'd like to see them. I just don't know what to say to anyone anymore. People ask me how I am. I'm fine. Just fucking fine. Considering nobody listens to me and everybody thinks that I'm some kind of family breaking up psycho who out of nowhere freaked out and completely unjustly assaulted my mother-in-law (oh yes, it's come to that), I'm doing just fucking great.

I don't even know what to think anymore.

Kids are: "Romeo and Juliet" Indigo Girls. This was my song for Jesse. God I miss him.

Last person who pissed me off: DMIL and her fucking husband. They can both fuck off.

Heard in my house: "I'm tired of this. Please make it stop."

<< || >>

Miss Anything?

pics - 2007-06-05
I said I'd update again, but I didn't promise substance - 2007-06-04
I said I'd update again, but I didn' - 2007-06-04
the short version - 2007-05-30
title this - 2007-04-14

Weblog Commenting and Trackback by HaloScan.com<< # Bitch Club ? >>

Brushes - Host - Photos - Reviews - Wishlist - LiveJournal - Cast - Free Stuff - Adagio Teas